Psychological approach(just quoting something told be a genius)

Knowing how someone wants to be loved and then providing that love are two separate things. Sometimes marriages and other relationships end because either one person does not understand how to love or meet the needs of the other; or one partner refuses to meet the needs of the other.

To love consciously is a choice. Mary Beth and I often say being married is very similar to having another full-time job – you get out of it what you put into it.

Our marriage is like a savings account. My wife and I make deposits into it never expecting we may need to make a withdrawal. However, when we do request a withdrawal there are no associated penalties.

Yes, we argue over the temperature in the car or who really forgot to feed the dog, but when it really matters; when it really counts, we make the consciousness choice to give each other the love that is requested and needed.

With over 23 years of marriage under our belts, we have found the following strategies work best to love intentionally; to love authentically and to love consciously.

Show Appreciation
A simple “thank you” in response to a trivial or ordinary item can make a significant difference. It only takes a few short moments to utter these two words, but the impact can be felt for a very long time.

Showing gratitude is also the best strategy for ensuring the things you are most grateful for continue to happen. When we stop and tell our partners what we are grateful for, we are also telling the Universe. By making the effort, the conscious decision, to express our thanks we are in a better position of receiving more of it in the future.

If you want your partner to be grateful, it starts by you showing gratitude, first.

Be Happy, Not Right
Here’s a question for you, “Would you rather be right, or happy?” Too often our pride and egos can keep us from enjoying intimate relationships. We stew over what we think are injustices, but are perhaps only misunderstandings.

We carry grudges and do not show enough grace, passion or forgiveness to the person we care most about. Our need to be right can overshadow our need to receive, and give, love.
Take a look at what your pride is costing you. If intimacy is strained and the relationship is off track you may want to reconsider the value of your anger or self righteousness. Here’s the thing: You may be right in the argument although you partner thinks otherwise, but you will never be wrong when you put your partner first.

Happiness always feels better than vindication.

Crazy for you

I don’t just dream about you
Thoughts of you bring heaven
To my every waking hour

I don’t just want to be with you
I want to feel all the fire of
Existence that I feel when you are near

I don’t just need your kiss
I hunger for it the way a spring rose
Craves sunshine and rain

I am not just in love with you
I am absolutely crazy about you!

You are the best thing that
Ever happened to me
And I am certain that what we
Share will only keep getting better!!!

Strength-Courage

It takes strength to be firm
It takes courage to be gentle.
It takes strength to stand guard.
It takes courage to let down your guard
It takes strength to conquer.
It takes courage to surrender.
It takes strength to be certain.
It takes courage to have doubt.
It takes strength to fit in.
It takes courage to stand out.
It takes strength to feel a friend's pain.
It takes courage to feel your own pain.
It takes strength to hide your own pains.
It takes courage to show them.
It takes strength to endure abuse.
It takes courage to stop it.
It takes strength to stand alone.
It takes courage to lean on another.
It takes strength to love.
It takes courage to be loved.
It takes strength to survive.
It takes courage to live.

Heal me!

Sound of raindrops
So frightening
When they hit the world outside
People are sheltering
Giving up on their mind
I wanted to change the world
But slowly the world changes me
To that person I fear
You can't break me I say
Even though I know it's a lie
Because I'm weak
And I keep on sleeping
Thunder scares children
And I'm a child
Losing the people you love
But your emotions are fading
And you can't remember their faces
As you're lost in mine
I keep sleeping
Can I do more than just sleeping?
Loudly screaming
Heal me

First blast of light!!!

A glimmer through my curtain,
but one drop of sunlit beauty
Seems to me like all despair may have gone off duty
My guard is down, somewhat aware
Of this magic sight just sitting there
Gleaming through my window sill so bright
Watching the clouds part open,
feeling a spark light in my eye
I was once trapped in a world where day seemed dark as night
But hope broke through as strong as morns first blast of light.

Someone you are better without!

Anger and hatred
Is all I seem to be making!
Happiness and acceptance
Is swept aside as if I were faking
What did I do to deserve this?
All the good things in life I seem to miss
I feel as though I am innocent
I just don’t seem to fit
Should I take the easy way out?
Not many people will miss me without a doubt
What would happen if I didn’t even exist?
Everyone will be at their peak of happiness
But for the few people that would miss me
Don’t get any ideas to join me
For I have made a terrible mistake
No other one shall make
If I made an impact on anyone’s life
I am sorry I decided to take my life
I just had to find an easy way out
I am just someone you are better without!!!

I sleep in the clouds, dream in the sky
I will keep dreaming as life passes by
I think my dreams keep me sane
I dream of happiness, a life without pain
Some people say, I am stuck in this place
And I will never go anywhere
But in my dreams, I have already been there
I know, someday, I will have to wake up
But I feel the real world is more like a nightmare
I am safe in my closed eye wonderland
This poem goes to all the dreamers who understand,
No matter what they say
Keep your dreams, but dont dream your life away...

Unseen

You're always in my heart,
Always on my mind,
No matter how deep the water,
You, I always find.
My memories are darkening,
You're getting more unclear,
I've fallen into a tunnel,
But I am not to fear.
Very soon we'll be as one,
Together as we once had been,
Filling our memory boxes,F
or another year of being unseen.

Always(Dedicated to my best frnd)

I am a rose, you are my thorns,
Clutching to me, protecting me.
I am the sun, you are my rays,
Helping me to shine and to be all that I can.
I am a lake, you are my water,
Filling me with ideas, dreams, and hopes for the future.
I am a tree, you are my leaves,
sharing who and what I am
And becoming an important part of my life.
I am a heart, you are my beat,
Beating rhythmically to my happiness,
my fear, my sadness, my excitement
I am me and you are with me,
to share all that I am,
to share my feelings-happiness, sorrow...
Always.

For my Best friend

I'm not sure when it happened
But I'm very glad it did
You came into my life when
I really needed a friend
The more I get to know you
The more I know myself
And this is why I'm thankful
For you are just yourself
You and I are different
And in many ways the same
Your good ear, compassionate heart
Will always find you fame
I promise to always be here
Forever and to the end
You are the true definition of
My Very Best Friend!

Forever

I saw you from a distance
And I liked what my eyes did see
But not sure if we were meant to be
Still I made my way just to see
If I could find out that you were the one for me
I smiled and said, "Hello!"
and you did just the same
What a pleasure you showed to me
But little did I know as we talked along
My heart opened to you
and went on to sing a song
You made me smile
and you made me laugh
I found you so special in many ways
People say that love is the key to a relationship
But it was in your kiss that holds the key
You brought a ray of sunshine to my life
And I smiled from ear to ear
Thought of you each day and night
To savour the special moments in every way
Where have you been all my life?
Without you, my baby,
I just can't survive
Such is a wonderful person you will ever be
Forever my love, you are so sweet to me...

Life so foggy

I see not what others see
The thick fog is blinding me
The fog of routine, that is of life
Unable to see what is near
It is impossible to hear
A drop of light makes it through
That light is what I see
The possibility of unhindered vision
But that is just for a moment
For tomorrow the fog will roll back
And that is how all life is
For my generation and yours
This fog is here to stay...

Weakness!!!

I gave in today
Just a little,
I swear
I've been doing good,
but, I was in such despair
When I found out
I couldn't stop crying
The pain was so bad
I thought I was dying
I'm really not proud
I know it was wrong
That's the problem with weaknesses
Temptation is extra strong
Don't judge me
You don't understand
It calms me down
Like nothing else can

Sharing love!

Watching whitecaps roll into the ocean of blue.
With a smile on my face just thinking of you.
The sweet memories,
the tender moments we shared.
They caress me like the soft breeze that fills the air.
The loving feeling I get when I hold your hand.
The summer night when we walked in the sand.
Waves splashing on the rocks along the shoreline.
Brings tears to my eyes knowing that you are mine.
Sharing a love like ours my happy heart sighs.
Watching the violet clouds carelessly floating by...