Giving up and giving in

Slowly drowning in my sorrow
Wishing things would be better tomorrow
Feeling like I am in an ocean of doubt and despair,
gradually sinking and gasping for air.
Knowing life is not a light switch you can flip on and off
Simply settling and accepting I have to carry on.
Trying to keep my sanity and composure intact
out of fear of how those close to me, might react.
Fears of inadequacy as a human, as a woman, burry themselves deep in my head
As I make a foolish attempt to have a good night's rest in my lumpy bed.
Since it seems like things will always be this way,
its frustrating because I have to go through it day after day.
Yet, when my quandaries are more than I can bare,
I can at least take comfort in those who really care.
You know who you are, and so do I.
That knowledge keeps me from going over the edge, from giving up and giving in.

You told me that you loved me
why did you leave me to cry in the cold
you swore this time was different
why does that line seem so old
You told me I was the only one
who could make you feel that way
you told me that you cared about me
so why didnt you stay?
All the nights you laid with me
alone in the dark in our bed
now I finally realize
you were just messing with my head
Love is such a powerful word
a word people often misuse
something they take for granted
something they beat and abuse
My wounds run deep inside me
there's blood all over the place
I think I’ve really lost it this time

My lonely soul

My lonely soul wanders
Alone in the walks of life
No other soul as companion
My lonely soul wanders..
Alone in the daybreak
I do my duties
In the walks of life
My lonely soul wanders
Alone in the life
I meet many other souls
Who are unfit for the lonely soul
My lonely soul wanders
As the days pass by
My lonely soul became
More lonely,
with no other souls as companion
My lonely soul wanders
Alone in the walks of life
My lonely soul decides
Not to die, but to face
Life in all its hardships
And my lonely soul wanders

Alone

Alone by myself
No one to talk to
Afraid of my surroundings
Alone by myself
In pain and fiery
I miss the happy days
Alone by myself
In my own little corner
Scared of what will happen next
Alone by myself
I think about my life
And cry until no tears are left to cry
Alone by myself
But not really alone
Only in my heart forever more

My love, my life

If only sorrow could build a staircase,
Or tears could show the way
I would climb my way to heaven,
And bring him back home again.
I would do anything to bring him back..
Because if I got him back,
I would get back my love, my life!!!

An island never cries

Hiding in my room,
safe within my womb,
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries..

Emptiness

Just a hollow feeling
My mask on the seat next to mine
worn out, beaten and battered
it had come to an end;
Just as smoothly as it started
the end was a quick one,
no nonsense, no stupid climax
the curtain came down in one swift motion;
standing tall amidst broken lives
no one cares if you stay back
to pick up the pieces
or make a run to the nearest exit;
full of anger and full of fear,
wanting to wreck the peace
my mind is seeking,i gradually lost it all;
running away from death
and escaping from the mind games,
seeking refuge from the stormi rushed headlong into life;
searching for a place to hide,
watching people trade money for love,
I shall begin to fill the emptiness that surrounds me
with the pieces of my broken heart..

I never want to be alone

Hold me close and don’t let go;
I'm so scared to be alone.
I've been by myself for too long,
And always had to be strong.
Now I only want to rest;
And lay my head on your chest.
Hold me close and don’t let go;
These wars I fight, no one knows.
Now whisper how you love me,
Say it tender and softly.I
am weary and soon will sleep,
But with you no longer will I weep.
So hold me close and don't let go,
For I never want to be alone.